Saturday, March 15, 2014
Thinking About My Parents
I've been thinking about my parents lately.
We live about 500 miles part. To be honest, I miss them. And I look forward to the next time I get to see them.
Dad and Mom are fine people. I have good feelings and positive thoughts about them both. And I am glad to have a good relationship with them.
It's true that a lot of us go through various phases of our relationship with our parents.
I remember the late Calvin Miller explaining that we "idolize" and then "demonize" our dads and moms.
We idolize them when we are younger. This means we tend to focus on their strengths and positive qualities.
Then we demonize them as we get a little older. This means we tend to focus on their quirks and weaknesses while convincing ourselves we are smarter, cooler, and more "with it" than they are.
In my mind, many of us "normalize" our parents when we mature some by accepting the fact that they are normal people like everyone else. We realize they are not superheroes or demons; instead, they are just like we are. Our parents are normal people who have strengths, weaknesses, victories, and failures.
My parents are not perfect people. I do get that. They make mistakes just like every other member of the human race. But they love God and they love my brothers and me. They've rejoiced with me when I succeeded greatly, and they've stood with me when I failed miserably. For that, I am grateful.
I don't know how much more time I have with them. Life is so doggone unpredictable. But I do know this: I love, appreciate, and honor them both. And I'm proud to say I am their son.
If you still have your parents, be fair with them. Don't expect them to be perfect when you know that you're not perfect either. And make sure you love them. Seek as good of a relationship with them as you can and treat them right.
Gary Parker was right when he wrote these words years ago in his book The Last Gift : "I learned this lesson: in the final analysis the best any of us can do is this - forgive our parents for the hurts they cause us and bless them for the gifts they leave us."
Thanks, Dad and Mom, for being great parents. God bless you both.